No Young Lady Here

The other day, a co-worker, Juanita, said to me, "I heard on the radio, they're having a contest for hot moms. I think you should try out."

Awww, she's so sweet.

Then, another co-worker asked me how old I was, forgetting she's asked me numerous times before.

"I'm 44."

"Really? I didn't realize you were that old."

The word 'that' is in italics, because she emphasized it.

"Yes. I am really that old."

"Damn. I always forget how old you are because you don't look it."

Emphasizing only the first 'that'. I think she was complimenting.

I often hear woman claim that they're a certain age but feel much younger. I'm not one of those women. The truth is--I don't feel like I did when I was 20, nor do I look it. There is a saying "50 is the new 30" and "40 is the new 20". I'm an accountant, but I'm pretty sure you don't need good math aptitude to realize, the numbers don't add up.

Women are pounded with advertisements on how to look twenty years younger; more so than men, because they don't age equally. As a man gets older, he has salt and pepper hair, unlike a female's gray hair. A man will become distinguished whereas a female becomes old. It's called weight gain on a female--middle age in males. Men have laugh lines, females have wrinkles.

When I hear the term "growing old gracefully", I want to slap the person that says it. I'm not wearing a tutu and doing leaps in the air as I shop for an under wire bra. People enthusiastically claim, "I'm not getting older, I'm getting better!" Denial is one of the first signs of old age. I could put an unripened peach on my counter, and in a few days, it will become a delicious sweet piece of fruit, albeit any longer, it starts to decay.

Bottom line, I don't mind getting old, because I am (notice the italic) growing old. I haven't reached the point where I have to remove my teeth to clean them and I can still wear sexy lingerie without having to match a bra with Depends™. I don't need compliments or words of encouragement. I've accepted my age. I've worked very hard for the wrinkle, I mean line, on my forehead and I'm okay with knowing that.